Interview with Asma Begum, founder of domestic abuse charity Soul Sisters

Why did you become an activist, what was your motivation?

I became an activist because of my own lived experience with domestic abuse. For six years, I endured various forms of abuse in my marriage. Things escalated when my son was 18 months old, and I realised that our home was no longer a safe space — especially for him. I made the decision to leave my perpetrator, not even realising at the time that what I was experiencing was domestic abuse or that I was creating a safety plan.

Six and a half years ago, I fled with my son and entered a refuge. I’m grateful for the safe space it provided, but no one ever imagines they’ll end up in a refuge. It was a difficult and isolating experience, navigating systems like the courts, police, solicitors, barristers, doctors, council services, and even the refuge staff. At every step, I had to fight to be heard and respected because I was often dismissed as just a ‘victim’. That label seemed to strip me of my voice.

I vividly remember crying in the streets because of the way I was treated by professionals who were supposed to help me. It was in those moments that I decided to take a stand. My faith gave me the strength and purpose to ensure that no-one else would have to experience what I did. I didn’t want another woman to suffer in silence or for another child to witness such trauma.

I became an activist to raise awareness about domestic abuse — its different forms, its long-term effects on mental and physical health, and the systemic barriers that make it so hard for survivors to rebuild their lives. I wanted professionals to understand the harm they cause when they fail to listen to survivors or treat them with dignity.

 I was diagnosed with complex PTSD, anxiety, severe depression, IBS, and other health issues. But through advocacy, training, and support groups, I reclaimed my voice. Now, I work to help other women like me avoid falling through the cracks and to ensure that survivors are seen, heard, and supported.

What are the most common factors that lead to an increase in GBV?

The most common factors that lead to an increase in gender-based violence (GBV) include isolation, lack of awareness about domestic abuse, and systemic barriers to support. Many people think abuse is only physical, but it also includes emotional, mental, financial, sexual, economic, and honour-based violence, as well as harassment, stalking, and control. The isolation created by perpetrators often prevents victims from understanding their situation or knowing where to turn for help.

There’s also a lack of trust in professionals, like police or doctors, due to past failures — evidence not being recorded, procedures not being followed, or inadequate training. This makes it harder for survivors to prove their abuse in court or access justice. Additionally, family and friends often fail to recognise abuse or don’t know how to support victims effectively.

Cultural and societal factors also play a role, especially in communities where stigma around leaving abusive relationships is strong. In my case, as a South Asian Muslim woman, I faced cultural expectations and fears about judgment, even though abuse is explicitly condemned in Islam. Women are allowed to seek divorce if abuse occurs, but perpetrators break victims down emotionally, making them doubt themselves and their worth.

It’s essential to understand that perpetrators are not born that way — there are underlying beliefs and learned behaviours driving their actions. Awareness and education about abuse, its impact, and the support available are key to breaking these cycles.

Finally, professionals and community members must remain vigilant. Abuse isn’t always obvious — just because someone is well-dressed or employed doesn’t mean they aren’t suffering. Health professionals, for example, need to ask open-ended questions about relationships and follow up sensitively. Every interaction offers an opportunity to help someone feel safe enough to disclose their situation.

By listening, supporting, and educating ourselves, we can create a culture that identifies and prevents GBV more effectively.

What are the biggest challenges to reducing and eliminating GBV?

The biggest challenges in reducing and eliminating gender-based violence (GBV) include systemic, cultural, and individual barriers.

1. Lack of Awareness and Education

• Many people, including victims, don’t recognise the different forms of abuse, such as emotional, financial, or coercive control.
• Myths persist that GBV is only physical or that it only affects certain demographics, creating blind spots in addressing abuse.
• Perpetrators and victims alike may lack understanding about healthy relationships, consent, and respect.

2. Cultural and Societal Stigma

• In many cultures, including my own South Asian Muslim community, societal judgment and stigma often discourage women from speaking out or leaving abusive relationships.
• There is pressure to ‘stay and make it work’, which prevents victims from seeking help.
• Honour-based violence and the fear of community shame can trap victims in dangerous situations.

3. Systemic Barriers in Support Services

• A lack of proper training among professionals (police, healthcare workers, legal staff) can lead to mishandling of cases, retraumatising victims, or dismissing their experiences.
• Survivors face challenges in navigating complex systems, such as courts, police procedures, and housing services, especially without adequate support.
• Poor record-keeping, procedural delays, or a lack of resources often result in inadequate evidence for court cases, leading to unjust outcomes.

4. Trust Issues and Fear of Reporting

• Many survivors don’t trust institutions, such as police or doctors, due to previous negative experiences or systemic failures.
• Fear of not being believed, having their abuse minimised, or being blamed, discourages victims from coming forward.

5. Economic Dependency and Isolation

• Financial dependence on the perpetrator is a significant barrier to leaving abusive relationships, especially when victims are unaware of the concept of economic abuse.
• Perpetrators often isolate victims from friends, family, and support networks, making it harder for them to seek help or plan their escape.

6. Underfunding and Limited Resources

• Shelters, refuges, and support services are often underfunded or inaccessible.
• Waitlists for counselling, legal aid, or housing support can leave survivors without immediate help when they need it most.

7. Perpetrator Accountability and Rehabilitation

• There is insufficient focus on addressing the root causes of perpetrator behavior, such as their beliefs, attitudes, or past trauma.
• Without holding perpetrators accountable or offering rehabilitation programs, the cycle of abuse continues.

8. Intersectional Challenges

• Marginalised groups, such as women of color, LGBTQ+ individuals, or those with disabilities face additional barriers due to discrimination and lack of tailored support.
• Language barriers, immigration status, and fear of deportation prevent many from accessing help.

How does your organisation support women in Manchester? 

At Soul Sisters, Empowering People, we are dedicated to supporting and empowering women, particularly those affected by domestic abuse. Our approach is holistic, person-centered, and grounded in our core values of trust, respect, inclusion, compassion, and empowerment.

How We Support Women:

1. Advocacy and Guidance

• We advocate for women navigating challenging systems, such as family courts, social services, health professionals, schools, and the Department for Work and Pensions (DWP).
• Acting as a ‘third voice’, we help women feel heard, strengthen their resolve, and rebuild their confidence so they don’t return to harmful situations.
• We also accompany women to court as McKenzie friends, providing emotional and procedural support.

2. Empowerment and Personal Growth

• We focus on building self-esteem and confidence through creative sessions, self-care workshops, mindfulness, meditation, book clubs, walking groups, and peer support.
• Women can explore their interests and skills through free training opportunities including podcasting, social media, theatre, activism, and entrepreneurship.
• We assist with practical needs like CV writing, digital skills, and re-entering the workforce.

3. Peer Support and Group Activities

• We provide safe, positive spaces where women can connect with others who have experienced domestic abuse.
• Our group discussions often align with awareness days and focus on topics like confidence-building, mental health, and coping techniques. While sharing personal stories isn’t required, it’s encouraged in a supportive, judgment-free environment.

4. Education and Awareness

• We educate women about the various forms of domestic abuse — emotional, financial, coercive, and more — and how to navigate systemic processes like family courts.
• For issues beyond our scope, we signpost women to trusted counselling and therapy services.

5. Advancing Change and Policy Work

• We collaborate with local and national organisations to advocate for systemic change and improve policies that affect survivors of domestic abuse.

How to Access Our Services

Women can reach out to us via WhatsApp, email, or through our website, where they can book a time for an initial conversation. From there, we offer tailored support, which may include individual mentoring, emotional support, or group activities. While we’re not an emergency service, we provide dedicated and compassionate help that is centered on the individual’s needs.

Our Mission

We aim to empower every woman to live without fear. Fear is often the unifying experience for survivors, even if they don’t initially recognise their situation as domestic abuse. We want to rebuild trust, confidence, and hope for all our service users.

At Soul Sisters, our values guide everything we do — whether we’re supporting service users, working with stakeholders, or collaborating with volunteers. Together, we’re building a future of empowerment, compassion, and strength for women.

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Visit Soul Sisters website here

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Featured image: Asma Begum